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Jokes, old or new (again!!!!)

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1 hour ago, Richard A said:

My wife would most certainly agree Tony. 😬

see we have a lot in common, that's why we get on

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10 hours ago, Maverick said:

actually there is no try, only do or not do :D 

I hope that you all read that with a Yoda voice in your head!

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Super Wammer

My wife would most certainly agree Tony. 😬

E5C18F93-0EBB-4678-B12D-ED4DC5D1B328.jpeg

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Super Wammer

7FB06CE8-722D-49CE-9CBC-84D8E01173FE.jpeg

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Getting there

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Moderator

A young couple wanted to join the church, the priest told them, 'We have a special requirement for new member couples. You must Abstain from sex for one whole month.'
The couple agreed, but after two-and-a-half weeks returned to the Church.
When the priest ushered them into his office, the wife was crying and the husband was obviously very depressed.
'You are back so soon...Is there a problem?' the priest inquired.
'We are terribly ashamed to admit that we did not manage to abstain from sex for the required month.' The young man replied sadly
The priest asked him what happened.
'Well, the first week was difficult... However, we managed to abstain through sheer willpower.
The second week was terrible, but with the use of prayer, we managed to abstain.
However, the third week was unbearable.
We tried cold showers, Prayer, reading from the Bible....anything to keep our minds off Carnal Thoughts.
One afternoon my wife reached for a can of paint and dropped it.When she bent over to pick it up, I was overcome with lust and I just had my way with her right then and there. It lasted for over an hour and when we were done we were both drenched in sweat,' admitted the man, shamefacedly.
The priest lowered his head and said sternly, 'You understand this means you will not be welcome in our church.'
'We know.' said the young man, hanging his head, 'We're not welcome at Homebase, either.”

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Super Wammer

Never trust an atom. They make up everything.

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0af2521f4cb6d15b8ba5bf756dbd2cc8e59601a4

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funjoke.jpg

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Anyone interested in a free ride in a helicopter for 4 people? Im still looking for two people to joins us. We leave early Saturday (Oct 24) from Kidlington nr Oxford then fly to Poole Dorset where will have breakfast. Then onto a yacht for mornings sailing then have lunch. Then a flight to Jersey for afternoon tea and return to Poole for dinner. Finally back home to Kidlington.

So anyone interested please pm me. Preferably someone with a helicopter and a yacht.

Edited by zeta4
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Moderator

I used to be worried about insomnia but now I don't lose any sleep over it...

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